I can't stop thinking about one particular hilarious memory of Lynn.
I am unquestionably introverted. Lynn used to say, You dwell in the depths. I can be silent and almost placid on the outside while worlds are shifting underneath. I am an intercessor. I take everything into the depths where I process them, deep unto deep, always open to new revelation from God, (but not always open to sharing them publicly).
There are some strengths to this personality, but many weaknesses! Not the least of which is my ability to carry insane amounts of stress deep within me. I am 100% confident that this is why I was diagnosed with "a fibromyalgia-like syndrome" almost 11 years ago. For me, it's the physical manifestation of carrying all the world's pain. This was NOT God's design for humanity.
Today, I can hear Lynn's voice beside me saying, as he often did, Come on up out of the depths, Babe! He would sort of wobble his head side to side saying, Come on up into the shallows! See, it's nice up here!
Everyone knows Lynn was anything but shallow! Still, although being very deep himself, he had this amazing ability to compartmentalize. He could take that very stressful, burdensome thing, shut it away in a box, file it according to his exhaustive mental filing system, then pick up his IPad and play Tap the Frog for hours!
Once, yes, only once, did I have the nerve to tell him how much he reminded me of a bobble-head when he moved his head from side to side like that. It didn't go over well. Still, I laugh about it internally every time. He was so hilarious...
Lynn, I would give anything to hear your voice today... to lean back into your arms, feel your breath near my face, and hear you say, Come on up out of the depths, Babe. Everything's going to be okay. I trust you, but more importantly, I trust the God who is in You. You and the Holy Spirit are always a majority. I know you can do it.
Father, hold my bleeding heart today! Show me the way to walk and I will walk in it! Lead me in the way Everlasting!
Learning to deal effectively with stress is a must - especially with everything you are going through. I pray that you find healthy, productive ways to release the pressure. Be well.
ReplyDeleteI know it's not at all the same of what you desire, but Lynn's voice will always resonate inside of you. My prayers are still pouring forth for you and my thoughts are definitely with you and Roya and Alea.
ReplyDelete~ Karen Wells
One of my favorite memories of Lynn is from my freshman year when he was showing a prospective student around the BBC campus. I ran into them in the chapel, where Lynn introduced us... then ran into them again in the library, in the cafeteria, in Stairs Hall, in the Student Centre, at the hockey game... and each time, Lynn would say "And [student], this is Jen Ochej in the [location]..." And we eventually decided it should be a line of Jen Ochej bobbleheads. When similar running-into-each-other-everywhere situations arise I always think of Lynn and laugh.
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