How is it possible? To experience such highs in the Spirit and such lows of grief, simultaneously?
This is what the Lord is doing in me...
17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3)
For me to know the fullness of God, to know the breadth and length and height and depth of God's love, my soul has to grow... The fullness of God's love is not something mystified or intellectual, idealistic or existing only the theological dissertations of a scholarly mind. The fullness of God's love is made manifest in the highs and lows of our very lives, of our every day experiences. No matter where life takes us, to what depths of sorrow, to what lengths of distance and separation, to what hights of glory and joyfulness, His arm is not shortened that it cannot reach (Isaiah 59:1). The mystery is this, that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). The saving arm of God's love and everlasting grace reaches into the very pits of hell (1 Peter), conquers every hindrance, overcomes all obstacles, and makes light to shine in darkness.
May you know and experience the fullness of God's love in the breadth and width and height and depths of your daily life and experiences.