I have had the most fascinating morning. There is no way to capture it all in this blog post, but I needed to get some of it down :)
I was meditating on Isaiah 41:10, an old favourite Bible verse God brought to my remembrance: You are my witnesses, says the Lord. And my servant whom I have chosen, that you may know me and believe me and understand that I am He. Before me there was no God formed, nor shall there be after me.
One of my favorite things about the Lord is how He reveals Himself, despite the churches poor efforts to bear witness to His name :).
Many years ago, God began revealing Himself to me, opening up my mind and heart to learn of Him, to know Him, beyond any particular denomination or theological context. Dare to trust me and seek me in the Word and by the Holy Spirit, no boxes, and no limits... Lynn was so good at this. He encouraged me in it. He had no fear when it came to branching out, exploration the true nature of God. He always said, God is big enough to handle it if I make a mistake. When we stay grounded in the Word and keep our eyes fixed on Christ, we can dare to trust Him to keep us and perfect us until the day of Christ Jesus...
Through this verse as well as others, God began in me a passion to know Him as He really is and not as we, the church, would make him. It stirred in me a passion to see God glorified in and through His church, that we would be true witnesses to the world of a living God, who breathes life and speaks perfect love, in pure blamelessness and holy otherness while being intimately close and making us His very dwelling place... This is the God I love and this is the God I serve!! He is the God of paradoxes, who cannot be contained within my historical context, my personal context of Biblical interpretation, or the extent of my own personal experiences of Him... He is always bigger and better than we think and He is who He is whether we get it or not! :) (I Am that I Am. Exodus 3:14)
This morning, as I was meditating on this verse, God brought me up into the rafters as I often call it, to remind me of the bigger picture at work in my life. He filled me with His Spirit, a renewed hope, and a glimpse... I caught just a glimpse of the woman He is making me to be. She looks vastly different from the girl I am most familiar with, that scared little girl, shy and afraid, hiding in her bedroom, praying for light and love. :) But I saw her, a woman strong and secure, grounded in love and powerful in the Spirit. God began this good work in me so long ago, but I didn't know if He could really do it!!! Surely it's not possible!!! With God all things are possible. (Matthew 19:26)
His faithfulness to complete His word is astonishing!!
As I was praying this morning, without warning, God stirred up in my heart the words I had written to Lynn: I see you. The real you. I know you. And I will always love you. I'm here. I'm yours. You'll always be my king.
In this song I wrote for Lynn, You are My King, God was teaching me about loving and honoring my husband. This time, though, He carried those words forth as a new expression of love directly from my heart to my King of Kings. I see you. The real you. I know you. And I will always love you. I'm here. I'm yours. You'll always be my King.
Lynn was my Beloved king, but God has always been King over my heart. His word to me is clear: You are My witness, says the Lord, and my servant whom I have chosen, that you might know me, and believe me, and understand that I am He. Before me there was no God formed, nor shall there be after me. I even I am the Lord and besides me there is no saviour. (Is 43:10, 11)